ATMAAV Thanks the ANC

Dear ANC 

As Secretary General of ATMAAV, (Association of Thieves, Murderers and Assorted Villains), I express our sincere thanks and appreciation for your enlightened initiatives in the sphere of legislation governing private security.

The Private Security Industry Regulation Amendment Act is a giant leap forward in addressing and redressing the wrongs and discrimination suffered by the historically disadvantaged criminal classes. The struggle continues, viva ANC, viva!

The  mandatory 51% South African Ownership regulation gives us, too, opportunity to gain a stake in an industry built on our blood, sweat and tears. For too long, foreigners have played a disproportionate role in an industry in which we have the requisite skills and experience.

I trust that, with his expanded ministerial powers,  the Minister of Police will deal firmly and swiftly with any attempts to exclude us from ownership participation. Do we not have a long history of shared interest in this sector of South African business activity? Some of our own people have worn the police uniform with pride. Regardless of what the Musks of this world may think or do, there is no stopping the great empowerment train.

The firearm usage restrictions have the potential to level the playing field very nicely (and may also give us the opportunity to level the opposition). It really is concerning that such firepower should be in the hands of private security operatives. The potential for abuse is enormous. Why, several of our members, innocently going about their normal business, have been injured, and worse. Do you have any idea what it's like having to explain to traumatized family how their loved ones came to such harm? Our only concern is that these restrictions do not go far enough. Surely a truncheon in the hands of the well - trained security officer should be deterrent enough. We would be fair, committing to leave our firearms in their safes, so that the game is evenly matched.

Yes, it is crucial that private security officers are at least as well trained as our highly skilled police officers. And are as effective. I trust that training will emphasize human rights, particularly those of suspects. One hopes that issues of stereotyping and discrimination will be addressed in great depth. Some of our professionals are still in therapy over gratuitous insults and name- calling. In short, we are comfortable with the enhanced training and accreditation requirements. We can't have any Tom, Dick and Harry blundering about, making our people's work even more difficult. Quality over quantity. We believe that there are far too many security companies and operatives swarming around the suburbs. The paranoia around crime is not healthy. Like some of my comrades in the enlightened political parties, I don't understand it.

We are also firmly behind the regulation of drone usage. Look at the havoc those things are wreaking in the Ukraine. We believe that we should keep our suburban skies safe and clear.

Once more, congratulations on your enlightened, progressive approach to the safety and security of South Africans.

Yours in the promotion of opportunity for all.

Richard 

Secretary General: Association of Thieves, Murderers and Assorted Villains (ATMAAV)

Tips for the blogger gratefully accepted 

Capitec Bank, South Africa  

1378565477

O Tichmann 

+27 833970723

ANC Excels

 I am outraged. 

I read that the ANC has been ranked as the 16th most corrupt organisation out of 7,000 worldwide. 

This is a travesty. Surely you belong in the top five, or at worst, top ten. 17th!  This has to be racism at play. How could they not top rank an organisation that cast off the yoke of oppression (though that bastard, Apartheid,  still rears his ugly blond head from time to time) and rose to achieve the following:

1. Misallocated, redeployed, wasted and looted trillions of rands that could have made a significant difference to the quality of life of all South Africans.

2. Failed dismally to deal with rogues, frauds, incompetents and thieves within the party.

3. Indeed, retained, promoted, transferred and otherwise rewarded so very many of the guilty.

4. Allowed corruption, incompetence, indifference, buffoonery to blossom and flourish in every sphere - wherever they lifted a leg and marked their territory 

5. And did so, so much more to transform South Africa 

Who else has turned bullshit into a sublime art form?  Who has conned millions into believing that being deceived, stolen from, lied to, manipulated, is good, liberating, revolutionary and should continue until Jesus returns. I use the word 'conned' innocently, as an abbreviation for 'convinced'. Once more, Africa sucks the dry hind tit. Once more we are denied our rightful place in the shadows. 

I think that the ANC, led by the redoubtable Ms Pandor, should take this matter up with the International Court of Justice. Perhaps Iran, (or some other friendly country equally motivated by a raging thirst for justice, world peace and the brotherhood of man), could help with the financing. I mention that only because I have heard that Iran is generous and well disposed towards us. No surprises there. We are both countries hard at work to right past wrongs committed against women and other historically disadvantaged persons. Kindred spirits you might call us, except in the matter of consumption of spirits.

South Africans will be delighted to know that, in the beloved country, are several other parties deserving of a place among the heroes of corruption, betrayal, lying and other black, oops, (sorry, SAHRC), colourful  political arts.

Here's a bit of 'he pushed me first' schoolboy nonsense between the DA and Action SA from X:

Action SA: "Lying is an art form with the DA.

The ANC today supported an ActionSA amendment to REMOVE the VAT hike and give South Africans income tax relief." 

DA:  "ActionSA has done a deal with the ANC to pass a 1% VAT hike over the next 2 years, making life more expensive.

The DA condemns this sell-out tactic by ActionSA, which has worked with the ANC to adopt the Budget and has condemned South Africans to a higher cost of living"

Is it any wonder that the opposition has been as effective as a perforated condom?

We are beyond the eleventh hour, on the way to failed state hell and the best our opposition parties can give us is "woof, woof, woof". 

"Under the spreading chestnut tree,

I sold you and you sold me"

George Orwell: Nineteen Eighty-Four.

Guys, the truth will out sooner rather than later. How you waste our time and hope.

I have to say that Herman Mashaba started out sounding like the kind of positive, forward - looking politician South Africa so badly needs. Lately, his bitter, victim - like bleatings have him sounding more EFF / ANC / MK than the old ActionSA. It's like watching a noble Tussaud wax work melt into a pathetic caricature.

But, to the point: well done, ANC, well done!

Tips for the blogger gratefully accepted 

Capitec Bank, South Africa  

1378565477

O Tichmann 

+27 833970723