The looters' version of the Desiderata - apologies to Max Ehrmann
Go stealthily amid the noise and the haste, and remember what joy there may be in looting . As far as possible, without surrender, be on good terms with all victims.
Speak your scam boldly and confidently; and listen to others, especially to the rich and the powerful; they too have their uses.
Avoid honest and ethical persons; they are vexatious to the spirit. If you compare your loot with others, you may become vain or bitter, for always there will be greater and lesser looters than yourself.
Enjoy your successes as well as your schemes. Keep interested in your own grift, however humble; you need real moolah in the changing fortunes of time.
Exercise caution in your business affairs, for the world is full of lawmen. But let this not blind you to what opportunity there is; many rubes and gulls are out there, and everywhere there's a chance of hustle.
Watch yourself. Especially always feign disinterest. Neither be cynical about loot; for in the face of all poverty and disenchantment, it is as essential as the air.
Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the scams of youth.
Nurture powerful contacts to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings. Many arrests are born of fatigue and carelessness.
Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the kleptoverse no less than the thieves and the tsotsis; you have a right to be here.
And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the kleptoverse is unfolding as it should. Therefore get a piece of it, wherever you perceive it to be. And whatever your labours and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life, keep cash in your wallet. With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a lootable world. Be cheerful. Strive to be wealthy.
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