Pap

I understand how the Pan African Parliament got the name 'pap'.

I listened to a radio broadcast of the proceedings. A cacophony; swearing, yells in several languages - sounds of the average shebeen in full Friday night swing.

'Let me explain how we got here', said the reporter. No need, madam. It is the familiar 'tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying', in the elegant phrasing of our own parliamentarians, 'fokol'.

The same happens at the AU, we were told. That's alright then. Comforting. I learnt that the pap is an organ of the AU. If the AU were a person, it would probably be an organ situated somewhere to the rear. Judging by the sounds.

The previous chairman, according to our reporter, wanted to continue his influence through his chosen one. 'He wants to rule from the grave.' Mr Malema could probably help him with that.

The uproar seemed to centre on getting a clerk to read a letter. What horrendous challenges the politicians face on this continent. They need our prayers.

Also influencing from the grave were those omnipresent colonialists. We were told that language and colonialism influenced voting. The French speaking bloc sticks together. As does the English speaking bloc. You just can't keep a dead colonialist down.

Throughout the bedlam, a lone voice called out repeatedly: "Call the police."

Hugo, bel die polisie.