Thursday 8 October 2020

Truth, Media, Mr Malema

Dear Mr Malema 

 Good on you for banning those meddlesome, captured media people from your events. I can see them squirming in anguish as they miss out on the revolutionary pearls of wisdom.

 Just today, someone on Twitter suggested that Mr Shivambu should sue Pauli van Wyk for 'deformation' of character. Initially, I thought that was an understandable spelling error. Then the chilling truth struck me like a strategically placed shoe in a parliamentary scuffle. What demonic powers do these journalists wield? 

No wonder you took that wise decision. I have cancelled her invitations to all of my press briefings. Sir, I trust only The Daily Sun for objective reporting. A tokoloshe, after all, is a tokoloshe, is a tokoloshe. No margin for fake news and bias there. Besides, any reporter courageous enough to chase a zombie down has my full confidence. I would give them an open door to all media events. 

 You were reported as saying that Mr Gordhan actually writes their questions (the suspect media people, not The Daily Sun). My, he is a busy man. I have long suspected his possible involvement in global warming, the American election and magwinya price - fixing. 

Sir, I am willing to follow that story, if you could see your way clear to covering some daily expenses. My needs, while on the murky trail, are simple. A hired Range Rover (so as to be inconspicuous in the relevant circles). Free passes to several...er...artistic dance clubs, where my informants are not afraid to bare all. I can assure you that I will write my own, penetrating questions.

 Yours in search of the naked truth.

 Richard

1 comment:

  1. Wonderful, Richard. Tokoloshe chasing is a noble pursuit.🤣👍

    ReplyDelete