A New Cadre

 Dear ANC

I was intrigued by one of your t-shirts, adorning a chap selling some dubious cigarettes outside The Workshop. 

I think it's yours. Brilliant yellow, with one of those inspirational Party slogans:

'Building a new cadre for the second phase of the revolution.'

You left out 'glorious'.

I am glad that you are building a new cadre. The old ones didn't work that well. Yes, they could reel off  Party clichès at the drop of a revolutionary beret. But not much else. 

In an RET candidate list on social media, one of the bright stars, Ms Mokonyane, was described as a 'mechanical politician'. And a tried and tested one to boot. Puzzling, at time of reading. Now, with the t-shirt slogan, also in mind, it becomes vividly clear. Building cadres, mechanical politicians.... Like Mr Zuma, I put two and two together. An 'Eish' moment!

I picture a cavernous underground lab, like a robot-buiding facility in a sci-fi movie. Your scientists bustle about, one eye on the revolutionary schedule and the relentless clock. 

 "How's the II coming along, Comrade?"

"Huge improvement on Model I. Remarkable Partyspeak vocabulary. Excellent responses in the simulations. Just need to smooth out the grasping movements."

 I don't know which election campaign this particular t-shirt line was designed for. You might be on phase 5 of the revolution for all we know. I just don't recall phase 1. Unless reversing at speed counts as a phase. 

Anyway, I do hope your new model signals a great leap forward.

Yours in the search for the Complete Cadre.

Richard

Tips for the blogger gratefully accepted 

Capitec Bank, South Africa  

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