Media Mogul to MP

Dear Mr Manyi

Media mogul, staunch standard bearer for His Former Excellency, Mr Zuma, (still excellent in every respect, according to that reliable witness, his daughter, Dudu), now a member of parliament for the EFF. Are there no heights that you cannot conquer?

Were you not also with the ATM party or did you just visit the atm from time to time? 

I expected great things when you acquired ANN7 and that investigative journal. 

"At last", I thought. "Unrelenting, investigative journalism from a cool, dispassionate perspective, unclouded by dubious attachments to dubious persons or organizations."

Is the TV station still alive? And that trumpet of truth, the newspaper? I haven't heard much of them lately. For some years, actually. I imagine that, had they survived, we would all have been set free by the truth about state capture and the thousand South African mysteries swirling in the ether. I bet you would have neatly dissected the Polish mess with the surgical skill of a young Chris Barnard. Oops, sorry, that won't do. He was white. 

Unfortunately, you are lost to the world of Journalism With Integrity. At least, we'll have an MP of integrity within the party of integrity and pure Pan-Africanism. You may have to brush up on your self-defence skills, sir. Your new party occasionally goes beyond verbal jousting to full contact kyokushinkai. I would be happy to take you through some basics at a fee that your new job would easily accommodate. 

Sir, what about the internationally renowned Zuma foundation? Ah, but you could handle that during tea breaks. I don't think a lot goes on there, unless Mr Zuma writes another car boot blockbuster.  

I trust that you have been fitted out for a smart set of red overalls, with matching beret. I look forward to your inevitably gooseflesh-raising maiden speech. All that practice on Twitter was never in vain. Have at those puppets of Western imperialism, White Monopoly Capital, neo-colonialism, neo-nazism, neo-apartheid and global hegemony! 

Incidentally, sir, it appears that the EFF road to parliament is as broad as the one mentioned in the Good Book. I am currently unemployed and keen to make a bu...., I mean, contribution. I've been told that I Iook good in red. I am a flexible, adaptable revolutionary at heart. Most importantly, I can carry a tune and march with the best of them, when my knees are not playing up. Should you spot another opening, my contact details are below. I am also quite active on Twitter, supporting the CIC and other heroes. Not least, your good self.

Importantly, sir, when I searched for your name on Dr Google's pages, what came up first?  Horror of horrors: Jimmy Manyi. You ought to sue the undies off those 'reckless bastards', throwing your slave name around so heedlessly. Perhaps you could, as a first act, introduce a bill on slave names. No need to thank me, J..., er, Mr Manyi. I scratch your back...

Yours in the struggle for a Pan-African love fest in the  new, borderless Mzansi and a 2024 vote somewhere above 10%.

Richard 

Tips for the blogger gratefully accepted 

Capitec Bank, South Africa  

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