Sport, Politicians And Marijuana

Dear Fellow South Africans

 I have not wasted lockdown time. I'm pleased to share with you my research findings on the links between sport, marijuana and politicians.

 There are mixed feelings about the more relaxed approach to use of the herb of the family cannabaceae. With this rigorousIy researched information, I hope to pour coke on troubled brandy.

 Taken in appropriate quantities, the herb can actually improve performance in some sports. We've all heard cricket commentators say: "He's seeing the ball twice it's size". I thought that this had to do with time spent at the batting crease. Then one of our top batsmen admitted to sampling some of the islands' finest on a West Indies tour. This may well explain why the islands have produced a succession of fine batsmen. When we had a West Indian coach, I had hoped that our team would come out smoking for the World Cup. A new significance added to the green and gold? 

 The jury is still out on rugby. Some rugby referees do have one wondering. I have noticed this particularly when The Sharks have lost against lesser teams such as Stormers, Lions, Bulls and others.

 Unfortunately, the weed does not improve the performance of politicians. I am not suggesting that our own politicians indulge. Nevertheless, consider these few examples, taken from less disciplined countries to the north:

 MPs see nothing wrong in debating the meaning of the word 'fokol' at taxpayer expense. 

 A prominent statesman responds to national crises with bouts of hilarity.

 A popular populist confuses the verbs 'kill' and 'die', using them interchangeably.

 A party whose middle name is corruption vows weekly to eradicate corruption.

 Said party appoints, promotes and supports, with gay abandon, members under thick, dark, nimbus clouds. 

 After more than a quarter of a century in power, politicians blame George Soros, the Dutch East India Company , the previous regime, Bill Gates, third forces, local La Costra Nostra, whites, and for all one knows, Martians for everything from shoplifting to billion dollar disasters.

 There are only two possible explanations: insanity or use of mind-altering substances. Then again, perhaps it's the saliva. 

 Yours in the quest for knowledge and answers. 

 Richard