Venom

After David Teeger was removed as captain of the under-19 South African cricket team,  one of our many, bright Twitter philosophers made the scintillating  observation that:

 "The child of a snake is a snake",

First sir,  we bow to your superior first- hand knowledge and experience of the ways of snakes. You are clearly steeped in such mysteries. One might respond that the child of a brainless buffoon is a brainless buffoon. It is quite likely, though,  that your own parents are sensible,  courteous people. They are probably grieved at the what you have become. They probably know that being a Mensch means treating people the way that you would like to be treated. It also means being sensible about commenting on people or matters that you know little or nothing about. Therein lie the seeds of the racism and discrimination that so offend your sensitive soul.

   

Of course if you are of the self- flagellating  self - hating order, that does present difficulties with following the golden rule. How kak must your life and lack of self- respect be to spend your days vomiting bile on social media?  Lately X has been teeming with your fellow snake poison philosophers and commentators. What on earth are you guys eating, drinking or smoking that you should be so miserable? Come on man, you're going to do yourself an injury. There's more to life than lying in the grass like a fat puff adder, waiting to inject your venom into the first pale foot that dares tread nearby.

Of course, you might fling the 'kak life' accusation back at me. I just thoroughly enjoy pointing out the rich talent in the room, which might otherwise  go unnoticed or unchallenged. What the heck, let's celebrate your valiant, uniquely South African struggles against the ghosts of van Riebeeck, Apartheid and other real threats to the revolution.

If you are really so concerned about justice and equity, do something more useful than spewing whatever you're feeding on into the twittersphere. Go help someone. Lots of people in South Africa do just that. Or you could write something (seeing as you are a person of letters) vaguely useful. But please to engage brain before speeding off. Used brains are more in demand in South Africa than the no-mileage models.

Ah, but of course, this is all racist, colonialist nonsense that trivializes the lived experience of the black child. Right? What shade of child thinks and writes this is immaterial. White tendencies, bloody agents, Uncle Toms, house negroes, sellouts - these are at the root of your unbearable misery. I feel for you, snake expert. The sensible thing is to ignore your flatulence and that of your ghoul club. But hell, you are as repulsively fascinating as a nest of fat, hissing reptiles (sorry, Durban snake chap).

Some members of your sad Whatsapp group have been complaining about lack of 'white support' for the national football team. They bitterly contrast it with support for the Springboks. And they, of course, have the latest stats on support by shades of paleness or tan? That sounds so ludricrous, doesn't it? Just enjoy your soccer and your Castle Lite man. Leave people alone. Let's cut to the chase: they play kak. Most of the time. I, for one, don't see the passion and determination of a Kholisi, Etzebeth, Miller or every other Springbok and Protea player. I don't see it in our soccer players. It truly seems to be a case of separating the men from the bafanas. Perhaps I'm as biased as you are when it comes to Bafana.. Or perhaps you snake experts should just grow up.

Tips for the blogger gratefully accepted

Tymebank , South Africa  

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O Tichmann 

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