Thursday, 2 March 2023

AI: Astounding Intelligence

 Dear Fellow South Africans 


So Mr Cele may become Minister of Intelligence. 

Some compounds cannot be combined without disastrous consequences, says a scientist friend. So it is with this particular compound. I'm puzzled.

Another friend,  who falls into the  Clever Black WhatsApp group  (though I suspect that he's actually a bloody agent), asked with a feigned look of innocence:

"Doesn't intelligence work require demonstrated intelligence?"

I gave him what the classics call a 'withering look'.  He didn't wither.

As an ardent supporter of Mr Cele's innovative approach to policing I reminded him that the Hatman  developed the mp=mc squared theory (more people  = more crime  - the population growth theory). A Nobel prize  winner, if ever I saw one

Of course, SA is awash with rumours 
What with the the dearth of investigative journalism. Our national broadcaster  has found a niche in the fascinating  funeral, tiktok, soccer and ANC public announcements business. Understandably, that leaves no room for the unimportant stuff. One of the most bizarre rumours that I heard recently  is that we have a live president. 

I hope that the intelligence people do better than they did in the July unrest debacle when madam Zuzu (local psychic) and my 12 year old nephew beat them to the punch. So much to investigate, so little time (before we make Zimbabwe look like the uhuru of democracy and clean government by comparison).

There are allegations that one of the most senior ANC people has been involved in shenanigans that would make a hardened mafia boss scurry to the confessional in fear for his mortal soul. There are stories of fraud, looting, corruption and murder that would make the sparse hairs on the head of Semion Mogilevich stand on end. I'm not sure that even Hatman, The Daft Crusader, with his cutting edge approach to crime fighting, would cut it here. Did I just say 'Daft Crusader'? Sorry, damned WMC manufactured keyboards! 

I've met some very angry people recently. The growing darkness of the New Dusk is taking its toll. A clerk at an internet cafe gave me such a fierce look when I enquired about services that I felt compelled to explain that I had no dealings with Eskom crime cartels. She then fixed me with a glare and I hurriedly went on to explain that I didn't know the Guptas either. She seemed mollified.

There is no doubt that we need superb intelligence services. In the police and elsewhere. But this rumoured appointment  - Eish!

Yours in the struggle to overcome this sinking sensation.

Richard 



Tips for the blogger gratefully accepted 

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