Baas Op Die Plaas

 Dear ANC and Friends

Some say that you are a mafia.

That's grossly insulting, grossly unfair. The mafia are amateurs compared to you, if half of what we read about you is true.

SANRAL, the state-owned roads agency, grants a very handsome bridge tender  to a company you may hesitate to contract to build a braai stand. Okay, it was only four billion. There will be cries of 'corruption'. But one can picture them applying their fine minds:

'So they have debt of some 418 million. Finances been described as being in a shambles. Said to be running a defunct company. Hmm, none of that means that they can't build a fine bridge.'

If so, I like the way you think. I myself am in debt, finances in a shambles. But I  

like building bridges. Can we talk sometime?

The bridge saga is just another of the weekly or daily reports from the front where the ANC fights a bloody battle with Corruption (winning, of course). I've seen boxers on the receiving end of a flurry of punches. That's how we feel. 

Please space your shenanigans. We are exhausted. Better still, take whatever's left and bugger off. We'll miss you but oh, the peace. 

More and more people are saying that life was better under apartheid. Of course you can't compare two abominations. 'This genocide was not as bad as that one'.

Under apartheid, people were reminded daily, by the entire fabric of their world, that they were, at best, second class people. The insults, humiliation, brutality gratuitous. Hostage in their own country to vile laws and the whims of vile people. Now, we are held hostage in our own country by the vilest thugs with weapons or smart suits. Now, we are reminded daily that we are, at best, second class denizens of this Animal Farm. And now, as then, notions of decency, compassion and fairness under the law are greeted with guffaws and belches. 

'You're good', says the mafia boss, played by Dr Niro in Analyze That, wagging a forefinger in admiration. You are good. From billion rand projects gone walkabout to state of the art R200 000 wooden mops. Tenders for half stadiums to hospital skinny jeans. 

Smart toilets to high tech taps

So inclusive: politicians, family members. employees, freelancers chancers, guilty bystanders - all feast off the vanishing fat of the land. From the top tiers of government to unknown rural councils, there is fun and frolicking to be had.

And there's your humour:

'The ANC is not corrupt'

'We have done well'

'Renewal'

'Integrity committee'

'Reshuffling'

And so many more brilliant one-liners.

In the words of Tina Turner, You're Simply The Beast, ...sorry, Best.

Yours in the flagging struggle for sanity.

Richard 

Tips for the blogger gratefully accepted 

Capitec Bank, South Africa  

1378565477

O Tichmann 

+27 833970723