Now It Clicks

Dear EFF Heroes

 As I am in a remote location, I am unable to join in the glorious marches on that vile organisation whose name I cannot bring myself to utter. I have, instead, occupied PEP, who also parade hair products on their shelves.

 I smeared a double dose of sanitizer on my hands as a symbolic cleansing. Things went slightly awry. When I fixed an assistant with a stern revolutionary glare, she slipped me her mobile number. The revolution has no time for such frivolity. I am keeping the number for recruitment purposes. 

 Someone on Twitter jested about Pravin being behind this scandalous business. Many a true word is spoken in jest. Why has he been so silent of late? 'Beware the silence of your enemies', said Cloditus, the Roman military genius. I would carefully check Pravin's movements over the last two weeks. Also those of George Soros, Bill Gates, Trevor Manuel (and let's throw in Trevor Noah), Anton Rupert, Steve Hofmeyer, Ernst Roets and Jacob Zuma. We need to scrutinize the list of Clicks shareholders as well. These are dark times, made darker by Eskom. I believe that the illuminati are a bunch of kindergarten kids compared to the pale forces arrayed against us.

 I am delighted that, like the Daily Sun, you have not been distracted by the smoke and mirrors of corruption scandals and Eskom's ineptitude. You both focus, like twin lasers, on what really matters: zombies, tokoloshes, insulting hair product advertisements and the like. I tell you, that's what's destroying this great country. 

 Yours in the struggle to remove the head (with hair) of this hydra.

 Richard