Friday 22 May 2020

Time Of Testing

Time of Testing
Friday, May 22nd, 2020
Dear Cabinet Ministers
Nothing like a crisis to hold a mirror up to society. Show virtue her own face etc.
As we are already testing widely, it should not be too difficult to slip in a few more revealing tests. These would probably confirm what we think we know; that Covid is but one threat, and not even the greatest one, to our survival as a nation.
For all councillors I suggest a variation on the ‘inkblot’ test. This would involve presenting the participants with a series of inkblots resembling food parcels. Their responses would determine who needs therapy and how urgently. Unkind people may say that we don’t have the facilities to cope with that South African pandemic.
Shop owners, subjected to similar tests, would be asked to name the first amount that springs to mind on being shown various brands of cigarettes. It would be interesting and revealing to see how far above 100% profit they are willing to soar.
On that sour note, by what bizarre twist of logic did you arrive at the notion that millions of smokers and drinkers would abstain at the stroke of a pen? The amount of scheming and plotting to lay hands on both makes the plotters in ‘Game Of Thrones’ look like bumbling beginners. Dear ministers, if you had set out to develop a brilliant campaign to promote those two products, you could not have done better. Mr Cele might be right about alcohol and crime but we’re certainly seeing a new wave of criminal activity. Ironic.
Dear ministers, you have lots on your minds, I’m sure, so let’s pause here - for now.
Yours in the struggle for rational, logical solutions.
Richard

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